okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
