please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
