Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
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