The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize