This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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