Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
