You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
