NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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