the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
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