And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
