drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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