I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
