Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
