They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
