they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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