I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now Iâ€™m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.