yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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