When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
