I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
