i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize