I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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