you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
