the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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