i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
God, I missed his penis.
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