Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
are you so shy because you have an std?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
