I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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