im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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