who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
God gave him joint rollers for hands
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
