she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
3 2 1 whiskey
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
