He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
there is glitter all over my balls
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