Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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