For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
