My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize