He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
