So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
