So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
