I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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