Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.

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  (918): I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater. http://tfl.nu/r4ec
  Replies (9) Good night (4470) Bad night (687)
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  (718): View more from New York

  im about as happy as oj after his trial

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  (718): im about as happy as oj after his trial http://tfl.nu/g9i1
  Replies (20) Good night (2525) Bad night (590)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.

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  (651): All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow. http://tfl.nu/8b4m
  Replies (13) Good night (8743) Bad night (1276)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.

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  (202): on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing. http://tfl.nu/q9c2
  Replies (22) Good night (6150) Bad night (1338)
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  (818): View more from California

  I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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  (818): I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder. http://tfl.nu/z8u4
  Replies (50) Good night (6621) Bad night (2497)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery

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  (603): its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery http://tfl.nu/k62j
  Replies (4) Good night (2825) Bad night (878)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...

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  (570): Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays... http://tfl.nu/ogn4
  Replies (10) Good night (2231) Bad night (1073)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.

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  (417): In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D. http://tfl.nu/wwrb
  Replies (9) Good night (2723) Bad night (872)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...

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  (786): It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries... http://tfl.nu/iebn
  Replies (11) Good night (2001) Bad night (706)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters

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  (401): Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters http://tfl.nu/a1rx
  Replies (2) Good night (496) Bad night (990)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.

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  (907): Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me. http://tfl.nu/90ns
  Replies (27) Good night (847) Bad night (3228)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.

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  (972): I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors. http://tfl.nu/zrt1
  Replies (5) Good night (609) Bad night (670)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.

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  (573): I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING. http://tfl.nu/4gcc
  Replies (6) Good night (904) Bad night (450)
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  (831): View more from California

  Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.

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  (831): Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success. http://tfl.nu/80xv
  Replies (1) Good night (379) Bad night (463)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred

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  (814): Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred http://tfl.nu/bcw1
  Replies (1) Good night (460) Bad night (209)

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