so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
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the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
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Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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