I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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