lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Semen is not good for contacts.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
