i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
