I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize