just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
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