He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize