i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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