what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Randomize
