return my video game
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
