yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize