It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
